Recently the YouTube algorithm decided I needed clips from @Taylor the Fiend, @Emilywking, and @The_Modern_King in my life.
I have no idea why — but it led me straight down a rabbit hole of WTFs and other emotions.
Apparently, some women out there have a checklist as if they’re worth the entire world.
Men should be: young, fit, not overweight, earning at least six figures, with a luxury watch, a flashy car, and preferably showing up with a 100k engagement ring.
Here’s the irony: on paper, I probably check most, if not all, of those boxes.
- I make over €100k a year (more in dollars — and if I did my exact job in the US, it’d probably be considerably higher).
- Steady job: Check!
- Own company: Check!
- Co-founder of a tech startup: Check!
- And no, I’m not making half a million or more like some of these women have set as the minimum. (Delusion 101 — check the Delusionmeter )
- I’m 48, so yeah, just within the default age bracket of https://delusionmeter.com
- Not obese anymore — on my way to Reacher status (see the boring part below), hitting the gym consistently three times a week or more.
- Well, I’m 192 cm — that’s a little over 6’3” for the metric-challenged. 🙂
So technically I might qualify as one of your unicorns. Which makes it even funnier that I wouldn’t date any of these mentioned women — even if you would pay me.
Why?
Because what they call “value” is confusing the value of a person with a currency. They confuse status with character, and they confuse “high maintenance” with — again — “high value as a person.”
These women are basically comparing a man to a walking ATM while bringing almost nothing to the table of the relationship.
Oh, and I can almost hear these women scream right now at the screen: “I’d never date you, you’re ugly, and autistic, and yada yada yada…”
My answer would be: try doing some introspection and see if there’s at least a grain of truth in this rant.
And just to make it clear: several of my friends would probably fit the unicorn model as well (c)(r)(tm) — and I’m pretty sure they would say the exact same thing!
Exhibit A: The Demands
I’ve seen quite a few of these clips — and the demands are outrageous, and in some cases even insane.
Three-star restaurant on the first date. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. What is wrong with coffee on the beach, a walk, or a movie? Intent matters more than location and the price tag. That tells me more about you than a gold-plated menu ever will.
Oh and spoiler alert: I’ve never been to a 3-star restaurant. Hell, not even a 1-star. The one “posh” place I did go to served duck liver pâté with chocolate (yes, really). We went home hungry. I’d rather eat in a place with good food than leave starving just so you can flex the menu.
The 100k engagement ring. If the size of the stone is all that matters, the story ends badly. Every time. And again — it’s the intent that matters! Not how expensive the ring is.
Don’t believe me, check this clip! https://www.youtube.com/shorts/-zSNZHKl2SE
There are hundreds of videos like this online. “Ten times my salary or nothing!” Okay… then you’ll simply never get proposed to, because it would take 20–30 years to save up that kind of money.
The watch inspection. “No Rolex, only Patek.” Really? My Polar Grit X2 was the most expensive watch I ever bought — and at least it tracks my heart rate. A Patek only tracks stupidity.
Why would I ever wear a watch worth that much money?
Do I think I’m “worth” it?
Yeah.
Is it practical?
Nope.
Can’t wear it in the gym, in the garden, or in the office.
So when exactly would I wear it? And I’d need a safe just to store it. Not to mention being scared all the time of the thing getting dirty or scratched.
So is it sane? Eh… no. I’d rather spend my money on something useful.
The car sneer. Guy shows up with a three-year-old car, and she’s already rolling her eyes. Newsflash: three years old is newer than half the world will ever own. You don’t want a partner, you want a car lease contract.
And what if I show up in a 10-year-old car that’s clean and well maintained, while I’m wealthy enough to buy a new one?
When did the age of the car become important…?
A car is a tool, nothing more!
The “what if” traps. “What if you were stuck in a room with 100 gorgeous women?” Whatever you answer, it’s wrong. That’s not love, that’s manufactured drama.
WHY!?
Exhibit B: The Contradictions
Lose my job? You’re gone? That’s not in sickness and in health.
That’s until the money runs out.
Cooking protest. Refuse to ever cook because “he can do it himself”? Cooking shouldn’t be a manifesto. If I’m home first, I cook. If you’re home first, you cook. Or we cook together. Pragmatic. Simple. Equal.
Because when you love each other, you don’t need manifestos — either of the two just does the damn cooking. Nothing more, nothing less. Because you need to eat, and because you care about the other person in your relationship.
And yes, I can cook. Matter of fact: I made dinner this evening. And no, I didn’t order takeout. 😛
Don’t believe me this happens? Check this: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/GY1XMY7Aouc
And off-topic: I clean the toilets, including the ones from our cats. I do the laundry, dishwasher duty, hoover the house — just like any other normal and sane adult would do.
Complain that the relationship is boring? Guess what — real life is supposed to be stable sometimes. If stability feels like boredom, you’re addicted to chaos, not love.
She actually says it! Don’t believe me, check this: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/NLxxHbhj1ss
Now back to reality
A relationship will be boring at some point. Hell, let’s be fair upfront — I’m boring as fuck!
And off-topic: I did my fair share of crazy shit. Bungee jumping, catapulting, lasertag (I even participated in several European and World Championships), festivals, LAN parties, you name it. I’ve had my wild days. Now I actually enjoy the peace.
And that peace doesn’t mean I’m done doing crazy stuff altogether. A parachute jump is still high up on my bucket list.
Our routine
Monday, Tuesday, Friday
06:30 — up
07:00 — work
16:00 — home
16:30 — gym
17:45 — home
18:30 — cook (together)
19:00 — dinner
20:00 — something together (garden, friends, TV)
22:00 — bed
Wednesday, Thursday
05:30 — up
06:00 — drive to work (audiobooks FTW)
07:15 — work
16:15 — drive home (audiobooks FTW)
17:30 — home
18:30 — cook (together)
19:00 — dinner
20:00 — something together (garden, friends, TV)
22:00 — bed
Weekends? Sleep a little more, do some work, research, learn something, maybe hit the gym, do something fun together ( spa, movie, dinner, friends ), clean the house, maybe something random.
Then repeat.
Welcome to the real world.
Stability.
Consistency.
Call it boring if you want — but this is how you actually build something.
The “Emotionally Available” Trap
And of course, the classic: a man must be “emotionally available.” Whatever the hell that means.
If you’d ask me, it translates to: show the emotions I want, when I want them, but never the ones I don’t.
- So if I stay calm? I’m cold.
- If I get angry? I’m toxic.
- If I share my doubts? I’m weak.
- Basically: whatever I would do or say… it’s wrong. Again, moving goal posts constantly.
The AI definition of “Emotionally available” is even more interesting
“Being emotionally available means being open, present, and willing to share and receive emotions in a healthy way within a relationship, fostering deeper connections and trust. Key aspects include expressing your own feelings, actively listening and empathizing with others, accepting vulnerability, taking responsibility for your emotions, and establishing clear boundaries”
And yet, the very women screaming they want an emotionally available man are often the ones least willing to practice those things themselves. They demand from men what they can’t (or won’t) bring to the emotional table.
Ohh, the irony, the irony. 😛
Hints
And then the bonus round: vague hints men are supposed to magically pick up.
When I ask you once, you deny anything’s wrong. If I ask twice, still nothing.
But if I don’t ask a third time? Suddenly I failed the test, because you would have “finally” admitted it then.
Jesus. That’s not emotional availability.
That’s a demand for telepathy superpowers and a need for permanent drama.
Did I mention shifting goal posts already?
Misogyny? Nope.
I don’t hate women. I detest entitled behavior — in both women and men.
Call it whatever you want, but “misogyny” doesn’t even make sense here. I share my life with my wife, we do everything together, and I’ve made it very clear: I hate dishonesty, arrogance and entitlement. Not gender.
The Labels: Alpha, Beta, Sigma
And technically? Fine, call me beta. Or maybe even sigma, because I see through the whole game and want no part of it.
Lucky for me, I’m happily married.
But if that ever collapsed?
Forget it.
I’d never date again.
Not worth the circus.
(And at least I’m not auditioning for Alpha Idol — or “SuperChad.”)
Delusional
Because spoiler: the kind of man these women are chasing? 90% of them are chasing after only a handful of men. And most of those men are already happily married — and want nothing to do with all the fuss and drama.
Still don’t believe those low numbers? Check for yourself: https://delusionmeter.com/
And to the guys
Yes, the “other” gender is basically doing the exact same thing..
Septum piercing theory?
Seriously?
Holy hell.
Generalization much?
You see a nose ring and suddenly you’ve solved her entire personality? Come on. That’s the same shallow crap I’m ranting against here — just in a different costume.
Not every woman with a septum piercing is a “walking red flag,” just like not every man with a three-year-old car is broke.
Stop feeding the meme machine.
This is just one example. If I would dig a bit further, I could easily write a rant of the same length about men with insane demands. Different words, same circus.
Social media
And then the elephant in the room. Why, oh why, are both sides recording themselves trying to give advice to other men and/or women (delete what doesn’t apply)?
Ever heard of social media algorithms? Basically, once you post this shit, you will actually SEE more of the same shit — re-enforcing your own drama, and those of others. Which means your — and everyone who’s in the same rabbit hole (Alice wants it back!) — whole drama becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Congratulations — you gamed yourself, male or female.
Got that off my chest — which is sore, by the way… GYM FTW!
Note to self: why am I even responding to this nonsense? Me responding makes me part of the issue too. OOPS! GUILTY!
Brain out!
PS. If this rant somehow goes viral and gets picked up by YouTube, Reddit threads, or Slashdot — please, don’t email me for dates or your insults 😛
See paragraph 27.2.1.6.5 section 24b where I clearly said I’d rather save my peace and quiet 😛
paragraph 27.2.1.6.5
Section 24b
Yes, this actually is the mentioned paragraph and section.
This blogpost is a rant, please do not take it too seriously.
And yes: don’t email me for dates or for your insults. I’d rather save my peace and quiet.
Seriously, both would probably end up in /dev/null anyway.
Again.. Brain out!